Hi, and thanks for stopping by! I can’t believe it’s the first week of school already. I hope you enjoyed the summer months as much as I did. I’m a little bit bummed that my summer vacation is over. While I’m excited to see all my friends, I’m not excited about the “school” part of school. Especially the homework and practicing piano parts. Every year, before school starts, I have a back-to-school routine. My back-to-school routine includes getting school supplies, picking out my “first day of school” outfit, and getting a haircut.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t like getting my hair cut. It’s not because Elaine, the woman who cuts my hair, does a bad job. Just the opposite. I just don’t like my hair when it looks shorter.
When I ask Elaine to “please just trim the ends—but only a tiny amount,” Elaine always teases me.
“Who wants to pay for a haircut and have your hair stay the same length?” Elaine says. I know Elaine is right. I think the reason I don’t like getting my haircut is that the cut hair gets everywhere. Even when you wear a cape. (And not the superhero kind.) Whenever I come back from a haircut, I have to change my shirt. The cut hairs are just too itchy.
This year, I learned an important life lesson from my back-to-school haircut: the importance of respecting people’s efforts and contributions—especially for those who are responsible for your happiness and well-being. You may think this is a blog about me being disrespectful to Elaine, the hairdresser. But you’re wrong. (And also, how dare you think that? Ha ha!) It’s actually about me not respecting my mother.
Let me tell you what happened…
Inside out
I had forgotten that we had a hair appointment scheduled for Tuesday afternoon. The day before school started. I wasn’t planning on going anywhere that day because I had to finish my summer reading book. (If only the assigned books were Hurricamp! or Miscommunicamp!)
When I got dressed that morning, I put on a T-shirt that I usually only wear on an “inside day.” An “inside day” item is an article of clothing you wear when you don’t expect to see anyone. It’s kind of like clothing that has lost its privileges to be seen outside your home. Maybe it’s ripped, doesn’t fit correctly, or the style has changed since you bought it. Often, inside day clothing is something you should probably say goodbye to.
Take my older sister Jill’s inside day headband. Her headband is so ugly that even Jill makes fun of it. But Jill won’t get rid of it. Jill wears her inside day headband whenever she’s studying for a big exam or when she does her home spa treatments. For the spa treatments, Jill applies a funny-looking green mask. We all tell Jill that she looks like an alien. Jill never thinks that joke is funny.
Anyway, my inside day shirt is my favorite soccer jersey from our championship season. We won two years ago. I’ve worn the jersey so often that the color is about three shades lighter than when I first got it. It has also lost its t-shirt shape and may be slightly too small on me. Though, the tight arms make me look like I have big muscles. So, yes, my inside day shirt has seen better days. But I love the jersey, and I wasn’t ready to give it up just yet.
If only I hadn’t forgotten about our haircut appointment. I would’ve chosen a different top to wear instead of my inside day shirt.
But there I was, wearing my too-small jersey. It was nearly four-thirty pm, and I realized I had to go out in public.
Hot under the collar
When it was time to leave, my mom noticed that I was wearing an inside day shirt. She wasn’t pleased about it. But she also didn’t want to be late for our appointment. Elaine had squeezed us in as a favor to my mom.
“Noodle, it’s time to go,” my mom said. She pointed to her watch as if to say, “Hurry up.”
“I’ve got to change my t-shirt first. I don’t want to wear this one outside.” My mom looked annoyed. “I promise I’ll be quick,” I said.
“Noodle, we’re going to be late. And on top of that, now I’ll have two shirts to wash. You know you always change your shirt after a haircut. Why get two shirts dirty? Especially when today is almost over.” My mom didn’t look happy.
“What’s the big deal? It’s only one more shirt. Who cares?” I didn’t see what the big deal was. It was just another shirt that I’d throw in the laundry. But then, I saw my mom’s eyes narrow. She looked angry. Clearly, I hadn’t thought that comment through.
“The big deal is that I will have to do more laundry. And that’s on top of all the other things I do to clean up after you. You aren’t thinking about the cost to me and my time.” My mom looked quite cross. “Just put a sweatshirt on over the shirt and let’s go. You can take the sweatshirt off before you get your hair done. No one will see the jersey, so you don’t have to be embarrassed.”
Who knew an inside day shirt could cause such controversy?
Cut to the chase
I knew that the more I argued with my mom, the later—and more infuriated—she would be. I decided to just put the sweatshirt on over my inside day shirt. As my mom suggested, I took the sweatshirt off right before my haircut. Even with a big cape, my inside day shirt still got hair clippings on it.
Thankfully, Elaine’s haircut looked good (though I’d still need a week for it to be perfect). As my mom had predicted, I was quite itchy when I got home. I decided to put my pajamas on early that night rather than change into another shirt. I didn’t need to make the situation any worse.
My mom came into my room before bedtime. We were both a little bit calmer.
“Noodle, the reason I got frustrated with you before was because you weren’t thinking about the impact your choices had on me. I know that one more shirt to wash isn’t such a big deal. But what you didn’t seem to understand—or care about—was that you were creating more work for me. And that felt bad.”
“I’m sorry, Mom,” I said. “I guess I sometimes take for granted how much you do for everyone. Maybe you’re too good at being the mom around here.” I was glad my mom smiled.
“You may have a point there, Noodle,” my mom said. “Though perhaps you and your sister should pitch in more with the laundry from now on. That would be a good start.”
“Oh, let’s not go that far, Mom,” I said. I hoped my mom was joking.
Turns out, she was not.
Giving the shirt off your back
Now, Jill and I each are responsible for putting away our clean laundry after my mom washes it. I know I won’t ever take my free “laundry service” for granted again.
What I realized from my inside day shirt experience was that sometimes just saying “please” and “thank you” isn’t always enough. In other words, showing respect through words is important, but showing respect in actions can be just as important. If not more.
I know that my mom is always doing something around the house to keep it clean and running smoothly. I could’ve made it slightly easier for her. As embarrassed as I was to wear my inside day shirt outside, the sweatshirt option had been a good solution. I wish I had thought of it before my mom got upset with me.
I guess I should add great problem-solving to the list of things my mom is amazing at.
Even though it isn’t Mother’s Day (or Father’s Day) yet, I realized that we should take more opportunities to show appreciation for those who take care of us.
And, in addition to doing a better job of showing gratitude, I’m also going to try and be better about saying goodbye to my old inside day clothes sooner. (Be sure to donate those old inside clothes when you can!)
Until next time, be your best you.
Do you have any stories about learning an important lesson from an experience? Please share with them me in the comments section!
